


guess my fairyale has a few plot holes

by oceansvause



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, but in a good way trust me, catch me using my fav song lyrics as a fanfic title like the cliche stan that i am, i wrote this without proofreading while i was very drunk, this is soft but also kinda painful
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:29:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22121104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oceansvause/pseuds/oceansvause
Summary: “i think i’m gonna have a panic attack”, emma stated calmly before her body caught up with her brain.she noticed how her breathing got heavier. how her head suddenly seemed dizzy. and how she just wanted to vomit.and then she felt a hand on her back.“deep breaths”, she heard regina’s smooth voice. god, that woman could read her the entire register of storybrooke and emma would enjoy it._or:emma knows this is supposed to be her happy ending. killian had given up so much and everyone is happy for her. but all she can think about is regina and how emma had promised her a happy ending.
Relationships: Captain Hook | Killian Jones & Emma Swan, Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan
Comments: 8
Kudos: 74





	guess my fairyale has a few plot holes

**Author's Note:**

> hey everyone! i am still drunk as i am posting this but i have a lot of feelings about these two and if you leave some motivating comments i might turn this into a 3 chapter fic because i lowkey already have it all planned out in my head lmao

_“To be honest, you’re too good for Hook”_

The sentence had been on repeat in Emma’s head for months.

She couldn’t get it out since they left hell. Every time she had kissed Hook, every time he had smiled at her like she was his entire world, every time her parents had told her how happy they were for her. 

All she could think about was Regina telling her how she was ‘ _too good for Hook_ ’. What the hell did she even mean by that? And why was Regina avoiding Emma like they were back to hating each other?

Emma knew that she owed it to Hook. He gave up his ship for her. He became a new, changed man because of her. He became a good person for her. He gave up so much.

She also owed it to her parents. She knew that all they wanted was to see Emma happy. For her to finally have her happy ending, too. And she was always seeing it in their eyes, how they watched her and Killian (and sometimes even Henry). Like the three of them could be a family. But obviously there’s no family for Henry if Regina isn’t a part of it. They should know. Every should. Emma did.

And Henry, sweet Henry. He really seemed to like Killian. She knew how much he idolized him and how happy he was that she's finally happy.

But Emma also recognized the frown and the sadness in his face when it came to his other mother. When he realized, again and again, how much she had to give up. How it seemed like she will never truly get her happy ending. How nothing seemed to be good enough.

And this was what left Emma empty, what left her heart aching. How could she be happy while Regina, who had given so much, still lost her true love? It wasn't fair and it wasn't right, especially because she was supposed to be the saviour, who brings back all the happy endings. And because she promised Regina hers.

Growning, Emma turned around in her bed. With all these thoughts in her head, she couldn’t find much sleep lately. Everything seemed like it was not enough but also way too much at the same time.

‘This isn’t how happy endings should feel’, she thought.

And this is how Emma Swan ended up in front of Regina Mills doorstep at 2am on a tuesday night. Even though she was sure that the older woman didn’t even want to talk to her, she just couldn’t resist.

_“You’re too good for Hook.”_

How could she be _too good_ for anything if she wasn’t even able to give Regina her happy ending?

After three knocks and two unbearable minutes of waiting for a response, the door finally opened. Emma’s breath hitched when, for the first time in weeks, Regina’s brown eyes finally met her green ones.

“Miss Swan.”

God, how she had missed her voice. Even now, when it was cold and distant.

“What are you doing at my doorstep at 2am in the night?”, she asked. It was almost like the old Regina, the snark and the sassiness. To Emma, this was a good sign. She had missed this version of her.

“We need to talk”, Emma said. With that, she brushed past the brunette woman and into the house. She was familiar with her surroundings, but she didn’t want to invade the privacy of the older woman too much.

“Can we go to the study?”, she asked carefully. Emma didn’t want to put too much pressure on the woman in front of her, but they both knew that a talk between the two of them was long overdue.

Regina sighed.  
“Alright”, she agreed. “How about a glass of the best apple cider you’ve ever tasted?”, she asked with a joking laugh.

Memories of their first meeting started flashing before Emma’s eyes. Before she could hold herself back, she heard herself answer.

"Got anything stronger?”, she asked with a smile.

This made the brunette chuckle while she was walking towards the study.

After settling down, Regina carefully turned her gaze back to the blonde woman.  
“So, what’s the occasion of your little late night visit?”, she asked.

“We need to talk”, Emma answered, her stern look directed to the floor rather than the woman right in front of her.

Regina let out a dry laugh. “So you’ve told me a few minutes ago.”

“Yeah”, Emma answered. She didn’t even know where to start. 

She didn’t even know what made her come to Regina’s house at two fucking o’ clock in the morning in the first place. All she knew was that Regina probably was miserable and she was miserable as well and this wasn't how happy endings and all this fairytale crap works at all.  
Emma was supposed to be happy, to have a family and a loving relationship with the man she saved from the darkness and her son who loved her and her boyfriend very much. But this all seemed like an illusion to her, like a task but not like a choice.

“I think I’m gonna have a panic attack”, Emma stated calmly before her body caught up with her brain.

She noticed how her breathing got heavier. How her head suddenly seemed dizzy. And how she just wanted to vomit.

And then she felt a hand on her back.

“Deep breaths”, she heard Regina’s smooth voice. God, that woman could read her the entire register of Storybrooke and Emma would enjoy it.

“In and out”, she added.

Emma tried to follow the woman’s advice and gave her best to breathe in and out as calmly as she could.

“You know, I still don’t understand what you meant”, Emma managed to choke out between uneasy breaths.

Regina looked at her confused.

“What do you mean”, she asked, while stroking her back. Even though Emma was distracted by the brunettes warm, calming hand, she managed to say the next words as fast as she could.

“How I am too good for Hook.”, she replied hastily.

After seeing the confused look in Regina’s eyes, Emma knew that she had to elaborate.

“You told me this. But he gave up everything for me. His ship, his life.”, she continued.

Then there was pause. Emma knew that she could stop right there. But she also knew that deep down, Regina was aware that this wasn’t all she wanted to say.

“Everyone tells me that this is my happy ending. But I just feel trapped.”, she confessed.

Finally, Emma felt brave enough to look up.

“Killian deserves better than me. I don’t feel what I’m supposed to feel. How can this be true love? How can I be the saviour?”

Emma didn’t even know when her tears started to fall. But she just couldn’t seem to stop them now. She felt Regina’s concerned eyes on hers and her hands rubbing small circles on her back.

“How can I be the savior if I can’t even make sure you’ve got your happy ending?”, Emma added in a whisper before lowering her head.

Her shoulders were shaking now and she was distantly aware of herself sobbing.

“You deserve a better savior than me, Regina. You deserve someone who can make sure that you’re happy.”, Emma spit out.

The brunette took in a sharp breath.

Then there was silence.

And Emma knew she fucked it up. She had made it even worse. God, only her could manage to make a fucked up situation like this even worse, huh?

“No”, Regina suddenly whispered.

Emma slowly turned her head back up.  
“No?”, she asked confused, blinking back tears.

Regina gave her a weak smile.

“Maybe I deserve someone else.”, she whispered.

And then, she took a deep breath.

“But Emma, I’ve always wanted you.”


End file.
